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The SECOND Part of Ways to feel and become successful like other people who constantly strive to be happy. At The Sleep Revolution® we believe happiness requires awareness, constantly being present and actions from our side.
By Benjamin Hardy
26. Stop obsessing about the outcome
Research has found that expectations in one’s own ability serves as a better predictor of high performance than expectations about a specific outcome. In his book, The Personal MBA, Josh Kaufman explains that when setting goals, your locus of control should target what you can control (i.e., your efforts) instead of results you can’t control (e.g., whether you get the part).
Expect optimal performance from yourself and let the chips fall where they may. The organic output will be your highest quality work.
Put most simply: Do what is right, let the consequence follow.
27. Give at least one guilt-free hour to relaxation per day
In our quest for success, many of us have become workaholics. However, relaxation is crucial for success. It is akin to resting between sets at the gym. Without resting, your workout will be far less than it could have been.
Foolishly, people approach their lives like a workout without rest breaks. Instead, they take stimulants to keep themselves going longer and longer. But this isn’t sustainable or healthy. It’s also bad for productivity and creativity in the short and long run.
28. Genuinely apologize to people you’ve mistreated
People make mistakes several times every single day. Sadly—and hilariously—much of the time we act like kids and blame our mistakes on external factors. Research has found that people who don’t openly and often apologize experience higher levels of stress and anxiety.
You don’t need that pent-up energy in your life. Make amends and let it go. It’s not your choice if people choose to forgive you.
29. Make friends with five people who inspire you
You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with. —Jim Rohn
Whom you spend time with is incredibly important. Even more fundamental is: what types of people are you comfortable around?
Your comfort level is one of the clearest indicators of your character. Are the people you enjoy being around inspiring or degrading, hardworking or lazy?
What kinds of beliefs do you friends have?
What kinds of goals are they pursuing?
How much money do they make?
What does their health look like?
All of these things dramatically impact you. And it is one of the most painful experiences in the world to become uncomfortable around people who have long been your friends. When you grow and evolve and long for more, you’ll begin seeking a different crowd to surround yourself with.
Misery loves company. Don’t let them hold you back. Move on but never detach from the love you have for those people.
30. Save 10 percent or more of your income
I would have saved 10 percent automatically from my paycheck by direct deposit into a savings account, earning the best possible interest compounded daily. I would have also disciplined myself to deposit 10 percent of any additional money from gifts, refunds or other earned income. I would have bought a small house outright with the money I had saved (instead of renting an apartment for over 30 years). I would have found a job that I loved and devoted my life to it. At least you could be happy even if you were not where you wanted to be financially. Hope this helps someone out there. —D. Lorinser
Tithing yourself is a core principle of wealth creation. Most people pay other peoplefirst. Most people live above their means.
In total, American consumers owe:
The U.S. Census in 2010 reported that there were 234.56 million people over the age of 18 years old, suggesting the average adult owes $3,761 in revolving credit to lenders. Across the average household, American adults also owe $11,244 in student loans, $8,163 on their autos and $70,322 on their mortgage.
Simply switching to home-brewed coffee will save you an average of $64.48 per month (or $2 per day) or $773.80 per year. By putting the savings into a mutual fund with average earnings of 6.5 percent interest and reinvesting the dividends into more mutual funds over a decade, the $64.48 saved every month would grow into $10,981.93.
31. Tithe or give 10 percent of your income away
One gives freely, yet grows all the richer. —Proverbs 11:24
Many of the wealthiest people in the world attribute their healthy financial life and abundance to giving some of it away.
Most people are trying to accumulate as much as they can. However, a natural principle of wealth creation is generosity. As Joe Polish has said, “The world gives to the givers and takes from the takers.”
From a spiritual perspective, everything we have is God’s (or the Earth’s). We are merely stewards over our possessions. When we die, we don’t take our money with us. So why hoard it?
As you give generously and wisely, you’ll be stunned by the increases in your earning potential. You’ll develop traits needed for radical wealth creation.
32. Drink 64–100 ounces of water per day
Human beings are mostly water. As we drink healthy amounts of water, we have smaller waistlines, healthier skin and better functioning brains. Actually, as we drink enough water, it’s safe to say we’re better in every way.
It’s a no-brainer. If you’re not drinking the healthy amount of water each day, you should critically assess your priorities in life.
33. Buy a small place rather than rent
Unless you live in a big city (which many of you do), I’m baffled how many people pay outlandish amounts on rent each month.
When my wife and I moved to Clemson to begin graduate school, we did a lot of front end work to ensure we’d be able to buy a home. What’s shocking is that our mortgage payment is far less than most of our friend’s rent payments. By the end of our four years here in Clemson, we’ll have earned several thousand dollars in equity and even more in appreciation. Conversely, many of our friends are simply dumping hundreds of dollars into someone else’s pockets every month.
Paying rent is like working hourly. You get money while you’re on the clock. When you’re not on the clock, you get no money. Earning equity is like having residual income. Every month you pay down your mortgage, you actually keep that money. So you’re not “spending to live” like most people do. You’re living for free while saving—often earning in appreciation.
34. Check your email and social media at least 60–90 minutes after you wake up
Most people check their email and social media immediately upon waking up. This puts them in a reactive state for the remainder of the day. Instead of living life on their own terms, they’d rather respond to other people’s agendas.
Hence, the importance of having a solid morning routine. When you wake up and put yourself, not other people first, you position yourself to win before you ever begin playing.
Private victory always precedes public victory. –Stephen Covey
Make the first few hours of your morning about you, so that you can be the best you can for other people. My morning routine consists of prayer, journal writing, listening to audiobooks and podcasts while I workout, and taking a cold shower.
After I’ve had an epic morning, and I’m clear on the direction of my day, I can utilize email and social media for my benefit rather than detriment.
35. Make a few radical changes to your life each year
Reinvent yourself every year. Novelty is an antidote to monotony. Jump into new pursuits and relationships.
Try things you’ve never done before.
Have more fun.
Pursue big things you’ve been procrastinating for years.
In the past year, my wife and I went from having no kids to having three foster kids (ages 4, 6 and 8). I’ve started blogging. I quit my job and started writing full-time. I completely changed my diet. I’ve changed my entire daily routine.
Without question, this year has been the most transformative year of my life. It’s taught me that you can change your whole life in one year. I plan on changing my whole life for the better every year.
36. Define what wealth and happiness mean to you
Be everything to everybody and you’ll be nothing for yourself. —John Rushton
No two human beings are the same. So why should we have one standard of success? Seeking society’s standard of success is an endless rat-race. There will always be someone better than you. You’ll never have the time to do everything.
Instead, you recognize that every decision has opportunity cost. When you choose one thing, you simultaneously don’t choose several others. And that’s okay. Actually, it’s beautiful because we get to choose our ultimate ideal. We must define success, wealth, and happiness in our own terms because if we don’t, society will for us—and we will always fall short. We’ll always be left wanting. We’ll always be stuck comparing ourselves and competing with other people. Our lives will be an endless race for the next best thing. We’ll never experience contentment.
37. Change the way you think, feel and act about money
Most people have an unhealthy relationship with money. It’s not necessarily their fault; it’s what they were taught.
In order to change your financial world, you need to alter your paradigm and feelings about money.
Here are some key beliefs the most successful people in the world have:
When you develop a healthy relationship, you will have more. You won’t spend money on the crap most people waste their money on. You’ll focus more on value than price.
38. Invest only in industries you are informed about
Warren Buffett doesn’t invest in technology because he doesn’t understand it. Instead, he invests in banking and insurance. He’s not a tech guy. He invests in what he understands.
Yet, so many people invest in things they don’t understand. I’ve made that mistake. I once invested several thousand dollars in an overseas rice distribution. Although the investment sounded incredible on paper, it turned out to be a disaster.
I didn’t have the understanding to make an informed decision. I put my trust in someone else’s hands. And no one cares about your success more than you do.
From now on, I’m going to responsibly invest in things I can make informed decisions on.
39. Create an automated income source that takes care of the fundamentals
We live in unprecedented times. It has never been easier to create automated income streams. No matter your skill-set and interests, you can put a business in place that runs 24/7 even while you’re sleeping, sitting on the beach or playing with your kids.
An entrepreneur is someone who works for a few years like no one will so they can live the rest of their life like no one else can.
If you want to free up your time and energy for the things that matter most, either invest in stuff you’re informed on (e.g., real estate, businesses, mutual funds), or, create a business that doesn’t require you (e.g., create an online educational course about something you’re passionate about).
40. Have multiple income streams (the more the better)
Most people’s income comes from the same source. However, most wealthy people’s income comes from multiple sources. I know people with hundreds of income streams coming in each month.
What would happen if you set things up so you were getting income from 5 or 10 different places each month?
What if several of those were automated?
Again, with a few short years of intentional and focused work, you can have several income streams.
41. Track at least one habit/behavior you’re trying to improve
When performance is measured, performance improves. When performance is measured and reported, the rate of improvement accelerates. —Thomas Monson
Tracking is difficult. If you’ve tried it before, chances are, you quit within a few days.
Research has repeatedly found that when behavior is tracked and evaluated, it improves drastically.
It’s best to track only a few things. Maybe just one at a time.
If you want to track your diet, a fun approach is taking a picture of everything you eat. Everything. This allows you the time to determine if you really want to put that in your body.
So, your tracking can be creative. Do what works for you. Use a method you will actually do.
But start tracking. After you’ve made solid improvement on your desired area and formed new habits, start tracking something else.
42. Have no more than three items on your to-do list each day
When you shift your life from day-to-day reactivity to one of creation and purpose, your goals become a lot bigger. Consequently, your priority list becomes smaller. Instead of doing a million things poorly, the goal becomes to do a few things incredibly—or better yet, to do one thing better than anyone else in the world.
If you have more than three priorities, then you don’t have any. —Jim Collins
So, instead of trying to do a million small things, what one or two things would make the biggest impact?
Dan Sullivan, founder of Strategic Coach, explains that there are two economies: the Economy of Hard Work and the Economy of Results.
Some people think hard work is the recipe. Others think about the most efficient way to get a desired result.
Tim Ferriss, in his book, The 4-Hour Body, explains what he calls Minimum Effective Dose (MED), which is simply the smallest dose that will yield a desired result and anything past the MED is wasteful. Water boils at 100°C at standard air pressure — it is not “more boiled” if you add more heat.
What is the fastest way to get your desired outcome?
43. Make your bed first thing in the morning
According to psychological research, people who make their bed in the morning are happier and more successful than those who don’t. If that’s not enough, here’s more:
Something so simple. Yet, when you make your bed first thing in the morning, you knock-off your first accomplishment of the day. This puts you in a mindset of “winning.”
Do it! It only takes 30 seconds.
44. Make one audacious request per week (what do you have to lose?)
Rainmakers generate revenue by making asks. They ask for donations. They ask for contracts. They ask for deals. They ask for opportunities. They ask to meet with leaders or speak to them over the phone. They ask for publicity. They come up with ideas and ask for a few minutes of your time to pitch it. They ask for help. Don’t let rainmaking deter you from your dream. It’s one of the barriers to entry, and you can overcome it. Once you taste the sweet victory of a positive response, you’ll not only become comfortable with it, you might even enjoy it. But making asks is the only way to bring your dream to life. —Ben Arment
I got into graduate school way after applications were due because I asked.
I’ve gotten free NBA tickets by asking a few players I saw at a hotel.
I’ve gotten my work published on high tier outlets because I ask.
Very few things in life are just randomly given to you as an adult. In most cases, you need to earn it and/or ask for it.
Yet, there are many opportunities currently available to everyone if they would muster the courage and humility to ask.
The entire crowdfunding industry is based on making asks.
Start making bold and audacious asks. What’s the worst that could happen? They say “No”?
What’s the best that could happen?
When you don’t ask, you lose by default. And you’ll never know the opportunities you missed out on.
Don’t sell yourself short. Ask that beautiful girl on a date. Ask for that raise or big opportunity at work. Ask people to invest in your idea.
Put yourself out there. You’ll be blown away by what happens.
45. Be spontaneously generous with a stranger at least once per month
Life isn’t all about what you can achieve or acquire. It’s more about who you become and what you contribute.
Interestingly, research done at Yale has found that people are instinctively cooperative and generous. However, if you stall and think about being helpful or generous, you’re less likely to do it. And the longer you wait, the likelihood of you being helpful diminishes.
So, be spontaneous. When you get the wild thought of buying the person’s food in the car behind you, just do it. Don’t think about it.
If you’re driving down the road and see someone with car trouble off to the side, just do it. Don’t think about it.
When you want to say “I love you,” to a loved one, just do it. Don’t think about it.
Paralysis by analysis is dumb. And Malcolm Gladwell explains in Blink that snap-decisions are often far better than well-thought out ones.
46. Write and place a short, thoughtful note for someone once per day
The messages of handwritten letters impact more deeply and are remembered longer than electronic messages. There is no comparison to this traditional form of conversation. Handwritten messages are so powerful that people often keep these notes for a long time. Sometimes a lifetime.
Jack Canfield has taught that writing three to five handwritten notes per day will change your relationships. In our email world, it can seem inefficient to handwrite and mail a letter. But relationships aren’t about efficiency.
Not only will handwriting letters change your relationships, it will change you. Research has shown that writing by hand increases brain development and cognition more than typing can.
Consequently, the things you write will be seared into your own memory, as well, allowing both you and the recipient to reflect back on cherished moments.
Writing handwritten notes spices up your relationships, adding an element of fun. It’s exciting placing kind and loving notes in random places for your loved ones to find. Put a note under the windshield wipers of your loved one’s car to find after a hard day’s work. Hidden, wait till they come out and watch them from across the street. You’ll see their eyes light up and smile spread.
Other fun places include:
Anywhere that makes the experience a surprise…
47. Become good friends with your parents
Many people have horrible relationships with their parents. I once did myself. Growing up can be tough and sometimes are parents make horrible decisions that negatively impact us.
However, my parents have become my best friends. They are my confidants. I turn to them for wisdom and advice. They understand me like no one else. Biology is a powerful thing.
Although I don’t see things the same way my parents do, I love them and respect their viewpoints. I love working out with my dad and talking about big ideas with my mom.
I couldn’t imagine not being close to them.
If your parents are still around, rekindle those ties or increase the flame. You’ll find enormous joy in those relationships.
48. Floss your teeth
About 50 percent of Americans claim to floss daily. My guess is that’s a large over-estimate. Either way, the benefits of flossing are incredible.
Doing so daily prevents gum disease and tooth loss. Everyone gets plaque, and it can only be removed by flossing or a deep cleaning from your dentist. Plaque buildupcan lead to cavities, tooth decay, and gum disease. If left untreated, gum disease can be a risk factor for heart disease, diabetes and a high body mass index.
Yes, not flossing can make you fat.
Not only that, but it greatly reduces bad breath.
49. Eat at least one meal with your family per day
If possible, eat a sit-down meal with your loved ones daily. It doesn’t matter if it’s breakfast, lunch or dinner.
We’ve become so high-paced in the world that everything we do is on the go. We’ve forgotten what it means to just be with our loved ones.
Eating together creates a sense of community like nothing else.
Teens who have fewer than three family dinners a week are 3.5 times more likely to have abused prescription drugs and to have used illegal drugs other than marijuana, three times more likely to have used marijuana, more than 2.5 times more likely to have smoked cigarettes, and 1.5 times more likely to have tried alcohol, according to the CASA report.
Gratitude is the cure-all for all the world’s problems. It has been called, “the mother of all virtues,” by the Roman philosopher Cicero.
When you practice gratitude, your world changes. There is no objective reality. All people perceive reality as they selectively attend to things that are meaningful to them. Hence, some people notice the good while others notice the bad.
Gratitude is having an abundance mindset. When you think abundantly, the world is your oyster. There is limitless opportunity and possibility for you.
People are magnets. When you’re grateful for what you have, you will attract more of the positive and good. Gratitude is contagious. It changes not only your world, but everyone else’s you come in contact with.